I'm having a gchat affair.

Flirting on gchat is just awkward. I find myself twitterpating after every single gchat I send AZ because I'm concerned that my sarcasm won't come through, my line won't be as funny in text as it was in my head, he won't understand that what I'm saying is a joke/isn't a joke. In a world where so much of our lives are lived through text, do our true messages actually come through or are they at the mercy of how they are interpreted in the texto/gchato-sphere?

It was while pondering these thoughts that I realized I am engaged in a full, fledged gchat affair. Not from my end what so ever, but from this guy, let's call him Tokyo, who has a girlfriend and gchats me like it's going out of style. I met this guy a few months ago when he had his current girlfriend. They were having some troubles and after the 3rd or 4th night of hanging out he tried to kiss me. Knowing he has a girlfriend I quickly dodged away from him and ran inside.

Since that awkward.com moment he has refused to go more than one day without talking to me through gchat. To make things even stranger, he doesn't live in Chicago and has tossed around the idea of coming to visit me to which I quickly replied with a resounding, "Ummm totes no way."

Now that I have a boyfriend, it has almost upped the antee of his gchirting. It's like everything AZ does for me, Tokyo has to explain how he not only did it for his girlfriend, but he did it 10x better. "AZ sent you a dozen roses on Valentine's Day, well I sent my girlfriend TWO dozen roses." "AZ is taking you on a trip, well I'm taking my girlfriend around the world."

I mean come on buddy?! I don't get it, what are you trying to prove? Do you want to wooo me through gchat? Do you escape your pathetic relationship by living vicariously through our gchat banter?

I mean, I get it, you're miserable, you don't like your girlfriend, but you're too co-dependent to dump her so you mindlessly flirt with anything that will pay attention to you because you have no other outlet to channel your un-satisfaction, but seriously find someone else to transfer your unhappiness onto.

Therefore, to remedy this little gchat bee buzzing in my ear, I realized that is why another miracle of modern technology exists: the gchat block.

So Tokyo, I'm sorry to say, but you've just been blizocked.

No one's getting out alive,
heels